Monday, 1 January 2018

Goodbye To 2017

Happy new year, dear reader! I'm sure it will happy some of the time anyway. Except when it's not. Because that's kind of how life is. If your life is always happy then please leave a comment telling me what drugs you're on and where I can get them.

Meanwhile, before I get on with this year I wanted to tell you a bit about the year just gone. 

In 2017 I: 

January: Curly hair.

  • Slept for hours. And had the weirdest dreams EVER. 
  • Folded MOUNTAINS of washing because I have SUCH a glamorous life.
  • Made the weekly pilgrimage to Aldi because I have to get my excitement somehow.
  • Started the year with curly hair and finished with spiky hair. 
  • Ate lots of bad food.
  • Ate lots of good food. 
  • Got a new shrink because apparently I am still demented.
  • Felt anxious in K Mart.
  • Felt calm in Coles.
  • Drank a billion cups of tea.
  • Borrowed tonnes of books from the library then forgot to take them back on time.
  • Drank cappucinos while sitting on orange chairs under fluorescent lights. 
  • Daydreamed.
  • Wrote pointless lists.
  • Wrote purposeful lists. 
  • Chose my 'one word': MOVE.
  • Decided to take this word as more of a light suggestion in favour of other entrancing words, such as REFINED CARBOHYDRATES and SLOTH. 
  • Pondered important questions.
  • Pondered trivial questions.
  • Prayed I didn't have cancer again. And I don't even believe in God. Weird.
  • Had my tits crushed. I didn't have cancer. YAY! 
  • Had a tooth ripped out. Which is always fun. Said no one ever.
  • Drank lots of Bailey's Coffee Liqueur in Wagga Wagga.
  • Drank champagne in the south of France.
  • Made stuff up. Like that last point. Incidentally I have no idea why the south of the France is supposed to be better than anywhere else in France. I'm never likely to find out either. Sigh.
  • Wrote in a two dollar journal from KMart with glitter pens from Aldi.  Yes, I know. There was no need for me boast about such things. We've already established how lavish my life is. 
  • Passed a lady at the shops wearing a vivid multi-coloured sparkly kaftan with her hair dyed just as many colours and thought she's probably quite fun to have as a friend. Or a complete nut. One or the other. 

November: Spiky hair. 

And I could go on and on, but it's obvious what an eventful year 2017 was for me. So it is with a wistful heart that I say farewell to you, 2017. No, we will never meet again, except in my memories. Well, let's face it,  not even there particularly, because I have a brain like a sieve. So it's a firm goodbye. You were neither good, nor bad. Just meh. Boring. Beige. But I didn't mind a bit of beige. I've had quite enough of pink, thank you very much. 

Let's see what 2018 brings. Be nice, 2018! 

What about you?

What did you do in 2017?



  1. Gosh I hope 2018 does play nice too! It cannot possible not, right? As long as you have my old fave shopping centre to haunt them I am happy. It was, for me, an 'escape' place where I would see no-one I knew and could have a coffee and two free donuts with no guilt whatsever! Thanks Ness for the care and concern for me in 2017 are a good mate! Love to you. xx
    Thank you for linking up for #lifethisweek 1/52 and next week's optional prompt is Word or Intention for 2018.

  2. I hope 2018 is good to you. And boring is better than memorable for all the bad things! Happy New Year! :)

  3. Your list is basically my year too except my calm was Kmart and Coles was the opposite ha ha!! Happy New Year lovely! x x

  4. Your posts always make me giggle. May 2018 be full of fabulous real and made up stuff.

  5. Happy New Year! What a joyous and quirky round up of the year!! Looking forward to seeing a bit of 2018 through your eyes.

    SSG xxx

  6. HAHAHAHA. "she's probably quite fun to have as a friend. Or a complete nut. One or the other." Perhaps both! Love it.
    Happy New Year Ness.
    Lovin' your bloggy header by the way!
    Looking forward to "hanging out with you" in 2018.