Tuesday, 24 February 2015

The Middle Muddled Riddle

Welcome to another glorious Monday! Don't you just love that feeling when you wake up on this most revered of days and the sun is flooding the room with it's mellow rays? Birds are chirruping an enchanting tune outside your window. Your eyes sparkle with uncontained enthusiasm as you fling back the bed covers bursting with joy and energy, ready to start another week?

Yeah, me neither. Farking Mondays. Who invented them, anyway? And I don't even go to work. Ahem. Shut up.

This morning we actually woke up stupendously late and then had to dash about like mad things with motors up our bums. It was most amusing. Unless you were us. In which case it was just plain annoying.

Additionally, the weather is dismal and gloomy. Grey clouds are looming with the promise of more rain. But this rain won't cool things down. It will still be hot and humid. Ridiculous. But I shouldn't complain. Except I just did. Oops. At least I'm not in Queensland, where Cyclone Marcia has wreaked her havoc. I hope everyone up there is keeping safe.

Anyway, without further ado, I now announce that the rest of today is officially cancelled. Of course, as usual I have no authority whatsoever to do this, but that has never stopped me before. DETAILS.

Please note that by the time I get around to actually posting this it will no longer be Monday, rendering all of the above obsolete. Except I have discovered that Tuesday mornings are no better. And all weekday mornings. Even Saturday is about to become fraught with early morning soccer for the boys. So frankly, all mornings suck. The end.

And now, moving on to other pressing matters.  Today I am making the monumental confession of my middle name. I know you've spent many hours pondering this, tossing and turning unable to sleep at night without this vital information. I must put you out of your misery. Therefore, I can now announce that my middle name is....

Drum roll, please.....


Worth waiting for, wasn't it? Quite ridiculous really. Vanessa Rapunzel. Hmmm, it does have a ring to it. I did have really long hair as a child, too. But there's only one problem.

I made that up. It's not really Rapunzel. Had you fooled, didn't I?What? Not for a second? HMPH. You smarty pants.

Fancy a multiple choice quiz? You don't? Too bad, you're getting one anyway!

May I present to you my middle muddled riddle!  OK, technically it's not really a riddle, it's a multiple choice question. But why do you have to be so pedantic? I've been reading WAY too many Dr Suess books with Mr 6, so just humour me, OK?  My middle name is:

a) Esmerelda
b) Jane
c) Anne
d) All of the above
e) None of the above

If you answered with c, then I WISH you were right. I would love to have Anne with an 'e' as my middle name. But alas, my parents didn't choose any of those names. The correct answer is, of course, e. Tricked you!

The suspense is killing you, right? Or you couldn't less, one or the other. If it's the latter, then we're done here. Click away NOW. See how easy that was? Now that we're rid of the riff raff, I can finally make my stunning revelation.

My middle name REALLY is.....

Bring back that drum roll....


With a totally redundant e on the end! Yay for redundant e's!!

This is exactly the same as my Mum's middle name.

But do you want to know something really funny? Like Mickey Blue Eyes' middle name? It's... wait for it...  Raeburn. Snorts. Seriously. It really is. I shouldn't laugh, because it was his grandfather's name or something.

Oh well, who really uses middle names anyway? Only when you fill out forms. In which case you just want something short and simple, so Faye fits that criteria.

And now you will have a blissful nights sleep tonight replete with that fascinating information. You're most welcome.

Stay tuned for the next thrilling update when I reveal something even more earth shattering. As soon as I figure out what it is...

Linking up for I Must Confess.

What's your middle name?



  1. Faye is not a name you hear much these days - but I'm sure it will be back, just like we are now seeing a surge in popularity in Ruby / Olive / all those other old lady names.

    1. Yes, there are some pretty old fashioned/old lady names and others that are just WRONG.

  2. There's nothing wrong with Faye. At least you have a middle name. My parents didn't even give me one and no one at school ever believed me (even the teachers) they just thought I was too embarrassed to fess up to what it was. Kids used to cry when they had to say what their middle name was they were so ashamed. My mother and both grandmothers were named Dorothy so maybe it was a good thing I didn't get one :)

    1. Then again, Dotty suits you. Just kidding! Sort of. *ducks*

  3. At least you got a redundant E on the end of your middle name Ness. I'm still trying to get over the fact that I'm an Ann without the E... ;)

    1. Yes, that is a TRAVESTY. I hope you had a frock with puffed sleeves to compensate. xo