Monday, 21 July 2014

An Interview With A Vampire

Kinking up this oldie but goodie for The Lounge today, just so that I can pretend I am still in this blogging game despite not blogging for over a month. Sigh.

 I've just realised that I wrote 'kinking' up instead of 'linking', but it sounds more interesting so I won't correct it. You're welcome. 

This post is inspired by the lovely Kylie Purtell. Last week she interviewed her husband Dave for her blog, which you can read here. I've decided that I might as well steal her idea and do the same, because;

a) it's a brilliant idea, and; 
b) I never have an original thought or idea EVER. It's just cake and Karen Carpenter swirling around in my tiny little brain. Otherwise- nothing. It's a vacuum up there. 

So without further ado, I bring to you: An Interview With A Vampire.

Um, I mean my husband Micky Blue Eyes. He actually isn't a vampire. He's an Accountant.

So you can see why I went with the vampire thing just to make him sound a bit more interesting. Ahem.

For ease of reading and comprehension please note the following:

Q is for question. Duh.

MBE is for Micky Blue Eyes, and indicates his answer (in bold).
Ness is obviously yours truly, and indicates my response to his answer (in italics).

I'm not sure how much longer he will actually be my husband once he reads this, so I'd better get on with it. 

Here goes:

Q: When and where did you first meet Ness?

MBE: Rotaract in 1993.

Ness: Actually it was at a Rootaract Rotaract outing to Studebakers Night Club in Parramatta, in late 1992, but that's close enough. Sort of. Kind of. Not really. Hmph!

Courting.  Or were we already married? Shut up, it's been a while. 

Q. Where did you take Ness on your first date?

MBE: Football/Club at Beecroft.

Ness: Um no. We went to see Sleepless In Seattle; as detailed here. This was really too overly romantic and sentimental a movie for a first date. Football (I'm assuming you mean soccer) would have been more fitting in terms of being prophetic. Years of freezing our bums off on soccer fields now in progress. 

Q. Why didn't you ever reply to those excruciatingly embarrassing heartfelt, yearning love letters that Ness wrote to you when you were dating courting? (NessShut up. It's my blog and if I want to make this sound like a Victorian romance, I will). 

WHY dammit???

MBE: I don't write letters, I express [myself] by talking. 

Ness: Does this mean I've married one of those weird people who prefer talking over writing??!! *faints*

Q. What is the best thing about being married to Ness?

MBE: [She's] understanding and caring.

Ness: You make me sound like Mother Teresa. Which is fine. I could totally go there and do the whole Nun's habit thing, if you want. Oops. Too much information. Sorry! 

Q. What is the worst thing about being married to Ness?

MBE: None.

Ness: I assume you mean nothing. Which confirms what I've suspected all along. I'm perfect! And awesome! Or perfectly awesome. Or awesomely perfect. Or something....

Attending another 'Rotaract' wedding
while up the duff. Me, that is, not
Micky Blue Eyes. unfortunately.

Q. What do you like the most about being a Dad?

MBE: Bringing up children in a caring household.

Ness: Yep, it's just like The Brady Bunch around here! No wait....

In order for that analogy to work, I'd have to either die or do a runner. This would leave you 'busy with three boys of your own'.

You would have to become an Architect instead of an Accountant. Go by Mike instead of Mick, and marry a Carol who is 'bringing up three very lovely girls'. 

All this while secretly being gay (not that there's anything WRONG with that), and sporting a bad perm.  Bugger that. 

You're stuck with me. As a sit-com family we're more like Roseanne. After all, they were the Connor family too, right? As far as I remember, Roseanne's husband dies and she wins the lottery. MUCH better! 

I mean...shit NO! I don't want you to die! Just the lottery thing. Otherwise we're stuck resembling The Middle.  A chaotic, dysfunctional family of 'quirky' people, living their not-very-glamorous lives in a not-very-glamorous house. Sigh.

Q. What do you like the least about being a Dad?

MBE: None.

Ness: Sorry, it's too late for that.

Oh! You mean nothing! Clearly our children are also perfect. This is very good news indeed. Therefore you should have no problem with me taking a sabbatical and disappearing to visit imaginary (online) friends!! Yay!! *starts looking up flights*

Micky Blue Eyes living by his motto:
'Take it easy'  (even at our wedding)!

Q. You've been married to Ness for a long time (almost 19 years). What do you think the secret to a successful marriage is?

MBE: Enjoying good and bad times.

Ness: So the secret to a successful marriage is being a masochist? Fair call. 

Q. Does Ness ever share any cake with you?

MBE: Yes. 

Ness: Yeah, that's only the ones I tell you about. Ahem....

The time I swallowed an entire cake.

One final, very important question that I'm sure everyone will be bursting to know:

Q. Are your eyes REALLY blue?

MBE: Yes.

Me and Micky Blue Eyes a..*coughs* 'few' years ago...

Ness: They really are. The more important question is: what colour are MINE?

MBE: *thinks about it*...Green?

Ness: I would have preferred 'mesmerising pools of glittering emerald' or something more poetic, but I guess green will do. Sigh. Okay, thanks Micky Blue Eyes. 

MBE: Thank you.

Move over The Middle. We can do quirky and chaotic better!

And there you have it. That concludes my very illuminating interview with Micky Blue Eyes. Now I'm off to find that Vampire to interview....

Linking up forLaugh Link and I Must Confess. 

What else should I have asked?

Any Vampires who want to be interviewed out there?


  1. Errrrr, did my comment make it through.....?

  2. Replies
    1. Urrrrg, no it hasn't come through. I've noticed this problem when replying to comments. I thought it may have been a problem with my browser but I've also had it happen when commenting on other blogs, so it must be a problem with blogger. Either way, it's terribly frustrating, so I apologise and thank you for your persistence. And I will try to fix it. I hope. *fingers crossed*

    2. It seems to be working now, so I'm keeping those crossed fingers. Sorry for the wasted five? minutes or so you'll never get back...

  3. Awwww.... I'm loving these interviews!

  4. CRACKER! And his answers were WAY better than my hubby's. He sure does have blue eyes! Thanks for linking :)

  5. Bahahaha, love it! I knew you could create something out of one word answers!

  6. Oh no now I'm panicking my comment has disappeared into cyberspace too!

    1. SO annoying! GRRRRR. Sorry Janet. :(

  7. But what I said was - love your running commentary Ness, or something to that effect!

    1. It seems to be working for me now...(fingers crossed I haven't spoken too soon). Thanks Janet. xo

  8. Micky Blue Eyes - Was that a gun in his pocket ...

  9. You guys are sooo cute and funny! 19 years - that is awesome. Well done guys :)

    1. Some days it feels like a long time, others it seems like yesterday... Thanks Renee. xo

  10. I'm loving these interviews..I might have to see if I can convince Paul to do one too!

    1. I hope you get more than one word answers if you do. Thanks Tegan. xo

  11. Absolutely hilarious. My interview with hubby didn't go well or to plan, it was gate crashed by almost everyone else in the house at the time. It is now up on the blog.

    1. Thanks Raychael. I will pop over to have a read. xo

  12. Cute! As said on Em's blog, I would never ask my husband to do this as he would be a complete smart-arse and not take it seriously at all. Mind you it could be a fun read for all of you, just not fun for me... ;)

  13. Yeah, I see what you mean but he might surprise you. After all, he wrote that great guest post a while back. Thanks Kirsty. xo

  14. Way too funny Ness and MBE!! I am shocked you share cake, it must be true love!!

    1. Yep, I throw him a few crumbs every now and again. Thanks love. xo

  15. I don't know how I missed this on the Laugh Link the other day Ness! Very funny! I LOVED the photos because I haven't seen too many of you. You is purty. I laughed at the way MBE kept saying "none". That's how my hubby'd reply. That's why I'm not going to put myself through it. We'd end up fighting. x

    1. They are all old photos because I avoid cameras but I don't avoid cake. Ahem. Yes, it would have quite a boring interview if I didn't embellish it a little. Thanks Pinky. xo

  16. I just tried to subscribe via email but it said I already have a subscription which I thought I had and yet I didn't get the email??? Maybe it inadvertently went into my spam folder. Silly Yahoo.

    1. Ugh. There is a problem with the subscription thing since I changed the blog title. I have no idea how to fix it. I had better try to work it out. Sorry Pinky. x

  17. Hilarious! Great looking family. V.

  18. I might have to interview SD - I'm pretty sure his answer to 'Does Sarah share cake with you' would be - 'What's cake???'