Thursday, 1 August 2013

The Best Thing I've Ever Done

What is the best thing I've ever done?  I have NO IDEA.  Ask me what I've never done. That would be easier to answer. The list of things I've never done and will never do is rather long and detailed. The list of things I will never do if I live to be a hundred and one, even longer.

I've never:

  • Travelled to far away, exotic places, unless you count Dubbo. And I certainly don't.
  • Had a thriving, successful career, or even any sort of average job that I've been remotely good at.
  • Made a five year plan. Or even a five minute one.
  • Known what I wanted to do when I grow up. Still don't.
  • Made friends easily and consequently had millions of the things coming out of my arse. Or, you know, I've just never had millions of friends. Forget about the arse thing.
  • Been adventurous. I've never wanted to do anything heart racing such as bridge climbs, white water rafting or bungee jumping. I'm a two feet planted firmly on the ground kind of girl. 
  • Been the owner of one of those sleek and blindingly white homes seen in magazines and on the telly.
  • Been stylish, elegant and effortlessly chic. Instead I've always be the one wearing too much eye make-up and a dodgy, at home dye job teamed with bargain, sales rack clothes from not very classy stores. 
  • Been one of those competitive 'Tiger' Mums, bragging about my kids  and how brilliant they are to anyone and everyone.
  • Been competitive, period. I can't win the race, because I'm never in it.
Anyway, I could go on for days with this list. Instead I'm supposed to be telling you the best thing  that I've actually DONE.  The truth is, I really don't know. Or maybe I do. It's just that it's not the things I think I should have acheived.

I will never have a home that looks like THIS.

I've stumbled through life, feeling like an alien. Along the way I managed to have the odd job, (even if I thought I was never very good at any of them), make a few friends, get married and pop out a few sprogs. Nothing remarkable. Nothing remarkable at all. Seemingly.

Also, before all of that I managed to survive through several years of infertility. The fact that I ended up conceiving at all was all because of the shit I did to help myself. Actually exercising like a demon and being *gasp*, healthy. Then, after we had our first two boys, Micky Blue Eyes was diagnosed with bowel cancer. Surprisingly, that wasn't very much fun. Okay, not surprisingly, but we got through it. Just when we had picked ourselves back up of the floor from that little shock, we had another shock. I was up the duff again. But this pregnancy ended in tragedy, when I lost the little man at 19 weeks, and, to make matters worse, still had to go through birthing him. That was actually the WORST thing I've ever done. I'm  supposed to be telling you the BEST thing. I'm getting to that. I think. I hope. Maybe. Whatever. You've probably stopped reading by now, anyway. Sigh.

I think the point I am trying to make is that sometimes the best thing you can do, the biggest achievement, is to survive all the worst things. Does that even make sense?

I've survived all of the above and am still relatively sane (okay, it's debatable), as well as bumbling along through life without the diagnosis of Asperger's until I was 40. Did I mention that? That was a fairly big deal for me and a gigantic yawn for everyone else. Which is what this post is turning into.  Sorry!

Plus, the fact that I've survived all of this and went on to become a Professional Bogan, boring everyone with this bogan themed blog is quite a stunning achievement in itself. Whether it's stunning in a good way or bad way- well, draw your own conclusions. I think you know what mine is. I'm a very proud bogan blogger. So ner.

Now I am also facing one of my biggest challenges yet. Potentially giving up cakies. I know. Heartbreaking. If I survive this, it could possibly be my biggest achievement to date. I am having a Glucose Tolerance Test on Monday. I get to carb load for the next few days before finding out if my cakie addiction has caught up with me. This should be interesting. Or boring as batshit, really. Stay tuned. Or tune out. Or whatever.

Linking up with The Lounge. which is being hosted by Tegan from Musings Of The Misguided.


What is the best thing you've ever done? It may not be what you think...
Reactions:

18 comments:

  1. I am truly sorry that you had to go through your husband's cancer and then a stillbirth. To my mind that is one of the toughest things any woman should have to handle. But you're right - you should be proud of the way you handled it all. You are one tough bogan cookie. I for one am never bored by you.
    PS: A great chunk of my family came from Dubbo which should raise your opinion of the place ;-)

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    1. Thanks, Mumabs. It really is one of the worst things ever. Can't even find the words, so I rarely blog about it. There is nothing wrong with Dubbo. Well, it's certainly no better or worse than Boganville anyway. xo

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  2. OMG giving up cakie??? Life is so unfair!

    Seriously though - surviving the bad stuff and coming out smiling is a huge achievement and something to be very proud of (and you never bore me ;).

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    1. Yes, shockingly unfair. No cakies is unthinkable. Sigh.


      Thanks for the kind words, Sarah.xo

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  3. Wow, 'Boganville' sure has had it's fair share of bad deals, your strength is inspiring. No cakies, no way, you will just have to get your 'gluten free' on, plenty of yummy options available. Good Luck! xx Nikki @ Wonderfully Women

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    1. This is just what I needed to hear as I'm becoming nervous about it all. Thankyou! xo

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  4. Oh my goodness, you can absolutely count 'survivor' amongst your finest attributes. And some of the things on your 'never' list aren't really worth aspiring to anyway (who has the energy for cleaning shiny white houses??). I'm sorry to read about some of the things you've had to endure. Congratulations on keeping your sense of humour and soldiering on. I hope many wonderful things lie in your future.

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    1. I know, it actually gives me headache looking at all that whiteness, anyway. Thanks so much for the kind words. xo

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  5. You have managed to remain kind, amusing, tolerant and loving in spite of going through rather a lot. And you are also pretty good at this blogging malarkey. You make me laugh, frequently too. I am sure there's lots more you are good at, did I but know you better.
    xox

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    1. Thanks so much, Ace. Yep, I'm extremely good at cake eating. And look where that's gotten me..*sobs* xo

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  6. Oh my goodness I couldn't give up sweet stuff - hope the test goes well. And I enjoyed your rambling post - go to know you a little better in all your beautiful bogan-ness :-)

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    1. Thanks, Janet. I'm hoping the test comes out okay. Fingers crossed. And I like that word - bogan-ness- that's me: Bogan Ness!! LOL xo

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  7. This is why I love you Ness! You can take what most people would find boring and turn it in an entertaining tale. You are a survivor and are completely awesome!

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    1. This is pretty special coming from the Queen of Awesome! Back atchya. xo

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  8. I love this post Ness! It is a fine reflection of a real person with real problems who has perservered. Then you throw in a bit of humor and whirl it up like a nice cocktail to give us an interesting blog, not boring at all.

    One of the better things you do is blog. You are a fine writer!

    I know it may sound like a man thing, but hang tough. It's the pain you endure and overcome that makes you stronger and better. Remember, no pain no gain. Nobody says it has to be all pain; why not substitute healthy smoothies for cakies most of the time?

    Good luck with the test, and I look forward to your next inspired tale of humorous self reflection or maybe something funny about the state of the world.

    Ben :-)

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    1. Thankyou Ben, for the kind words about my writing and also your thoughts about 'no pain, no gain'. This is exactly what I need to hear right now. Thanks again! xo

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  9. You, my friend, are amazing. You have been through some very, very tough situations and survived. This is far more noteworthy than that crazy white house. Can you imagine trying to keep that bastard clean? Big hugs. Mez xxx
    PS Good luck with the test.

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    1. Spot on about the house. It wouldn't stay white for long with my brood. Thanks so much for your kind thoughts, Mez. xo

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